One of those big mega telecommunications giants drove me to tears today. That was quite a feat. Not even when I was going through the worst of my living conditions, did I feel such despair, except maybe once. While Speaker Boehner held his tears, I allowed mine to flow, right about the time that the US Constitution was being read in Congress, and being ridiculed by others with a microphone.

I had signed up with mega giant and thought that my cable, Internet and cell phone services were taken care of – bundled – no more separate bills for the cell. Not even when I saw the hefty first bill, was I concerned. I paid it, literally sacrificing a few meals along the way. Then today, I was informed that I still owed for the cell phone and it would be cut off, because the “combination” of the cell with the other services, takes a billing cycle or two to be completed. It is my fault for not knowing, although I was not told. I should have been psychic and realize that was the deal.

I called about three different telephone numbers. In between trying to carry on a conversation with “Robot Bob,” as I affectionately labeled “him,” I was transferred to four different folks, where mysteriously the phone had static, got transferred, or I got hung up on. The irony of the static claim is that I was using the phone issued by the company!  

I got back at “Robot Bob” though. I actually cussed him out to the point where “he” kept repeating that he did not understand. They need to train these robot voices that have replaced humans, to “interact” when they are called “idiots” and “morons” with the caller acknowledging that she knows that she is referring to a mechanically programmed voice, and did not care! That would make for some very interesting “conversations!”

The adventure was not totally useless. The nice (human) lady who finally helped me, although we too got mysteriously disconnected towards the end of the call, did a readjustment of the bill, to where I received a discount on the bill, that was supposedly for the bundle, which turned out not to be a bundle. Ironically, I was so “traumatized” by my experience that although I did thank her, I was too worn down to fully appreciate the gesture, and I am normally an appreciative person. The experience convinced me that this is but one example of what could turn out to be an eventuality – the destruction of the US, done in by ineptitude and idiocy.

How can I make such a leap from a bad, make that very bad, “customer service” experience, to death of a nation? I can make that conclusion because my over an hour attempt to straighten out  a billing situation, with a company where one hand does not know what the other was doing – within the same company,  and I therefore got screwed – somehow reminds me of the halls of government.

The transaction should have been simple. But it turned out not to be. I have to pay, what I consider, the double charge for the cell phone, until the “cycle” is completed, despite having already paid almost the equivalent of the rent for a studio apartment somewhere in the country, for the bundle. Then I have to call back telephone #4 to request the bundling that I thought that I had already paid for. Apparently, there is no department in that big company that can reconcile this mix up. As a good customer, the onus is on me to fix their mistake.

Since I already signed a “marital” agreement, and I am hitched to the company longer than many marriages last, I will pay for the cell – although I am tempted to just have them cut it off. Like a good girl though, I will call back to request the bundling. I hope that they at least send me flowers and a cigarette, although I do not smoke – for our one day “encounter.”  

As far as the country is concerned, I am still going to stick around to the bitter end, but my optimism that things can be turned around in this country, took a beating today. Now I understand why big business and big government  have such bad reputations. Now I understand why American kids are just above Zimbabwe in global scholastic testing results.

Maybe I should go quietly into that socialist night and let the government take care of everything, including paying a doctor to give me “end of life counseling,” when that same government decides that I have outlived my usefulness!

Nah – I will not give up on this country. It will have to be taken from “my cold, dead hands” – after I have received that death counseling!  By “this country” I am referring to the wonderful ordinary folks who are being screwed, especially by their own government. They – my fellow Americans, are why I remain here when I could be kicking back in the serene waters of an island paradise.